Deliver us from stupid Hollywood films

A couple of weeks ago, someone I know, after scanning the movie listings of a Friday newspaper (and really, I’m dating that person just by identifying them as an actual newspaper reader), asked me, “When will we get some good movies?”

Without missing a beat, I said, “Maybe October.”

And when it happens, inevitably it will have little to do with Hollywood.

Because, really, Hollywood has abandoned the first three-quarters of the year, in terms of releasing films of quality on more than a deeply sporadic basis.

But let’s be real: In truth, Hollywood no longer cares about making good movies. Period. Quality is no longer a consideration. Full stop.

It feels like an almost weekly occurrence, if not a daily one: a breathless press release on the news page of IMDB or a bulletin from The Wrap: Bob Megastar set to star in a megamillion-dollar remake of “Some Inutterable Piece of Crap That Should Never Have Been Made Originally.”

Or Sir Sidney Superstar is onboard to headline as the villain in the latest movie adaptation of “Comic-Book Diaperload.”

Or Bill Upandcomer will be the main attraction in the latest big-screen adaptation of “That Lame ’80s TV Series” that only people under the age of 35 think was good in the first place.

This is what passes for entertainment news from the studios these days. More to the point, this seems to be the sum total of what the major movie studios are passing off as quality Hollywood entertainment. Really – that last phrase is now a painfully laughable oxymoron.

Because, at this point in movie history, the Hollywood studios are to movies what McDonald’s is to cuisine: a factory producing products that are nearly identical in their lack of depth, quality or concern for the viewing audience’s intellect.

This commentary continues on my website.

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